FromEmotional DivorceWhat do you know about its signs?
Emotional divorce arises from a lack of emotional connection, cold feelings, or indifference towards each other, which gradually becomes a behavioral habit. In emotional divorce, couples live under the same roof, but their emotional bond becomes unstable and shaky, meaning they stop caring about each other’s problems and thoughts. In emotional divorce, couples live together out of necessity because there is no joy or happiness.Happinessis absent. For instance, a woman without a job and income feels forced to endure living with her husband, or someone might be unable to divorce due to fear of being away from children, lack of visitation, societal culture, or family pressure. In such relationships, where partners gradually drift apart and experience despair and frustration, emotional divorce occurs.
Emotional divorce has certain signs, which we will discuss in this section of Family Plus.SelMagzWhat are they?
General Signs of Emotional Divorce
- Decreased excitement and enthusiasm in life
- Blaming each other, highlighting mistakes, and blowing small issues out of proportion
- Failure to use problem-solving methods
- Very little time spent together
- Increased outside-the-marriage activities and focus on issues external to the family
- Spending excessive time with children while neglecting a healthy marital relationship, which creates a coalition against the spouse.
- Reduced verbal, physical affection, and sexual relationships that lead to loss of emotional connection and loyalty, paving the way for infidelity.
- Revealing secrets and mistakes of spouses outside the family circle
- Focusing on TV shows and series instead of spending time together
- Lack of trust in each other to solve problems, leading to despair and hopelessness in family matters
- Not forgetting the past and dwelling on issues from that time instead of focusing on current problems
- Decreased dependence on each other
- Not acknowledging the problem or remaining in a state of silence
- Increased solo trips instead of family vacations
- Neglecting household chores, cleanliness, cooking, etc.
Worrying and different signs of emotional divorce
- One of the key signs of emotional divorce is finding more peace in solitude. Shared activities and fun gradually decrease, and each person continues with their own plans like singles, making loneliness a daily habit.
- Lack of willingness to discuss problems, ignorance, coldness, and denial of issues in response to the partner’s complaints
- Ignoring the words of the other person,impatiencein listening and speaking or remaining silent during discussions with the spouse, trying to end the conversation, changing the subject, or even ignoring the partner in life
- Prioritizing one’s own desires over the needs of the spouse, quick reactionsNegative feelingsand anger without regard for the spouse’s feelings
- A cold, lifeless atmosphere and silence prevail in the home, driving everyone away. In such conditions where children do not feel secure and peaceful, they spend more time outside the home and with their friends.
Various solutions to prevent emotional divorce
One important point that helps prevent emotional divorce among couples is recognizing and addressing each other’s emotional needs.
Generally, men’s needs are defined as:
Family support, admiration, companionship in leisure activities, etc.
Women’s needs include:
Love, conversation, honesty and openness, financial support, and family commitment; thus, observing these differences in the couple’s needs makes conflict and discord foreseeable.
Perhaps a man who loves his wife dearly thinks he is meeting her needs while she may perceive a woman’s needs to be similar to his own; hence, the problem starts at this very point. This applies to women as well.
Creating a suitable cultural environment, teaching skills in schools and through media, and counseling with professionals play a significant role in reducing emotional divorce. Emotional divorce leads to decreased trust among individuals, increased misunderstandings, and frequent family issues, causing people to feel despair and frustration without a reliable support system in life, which can lead to various mental health problems.