My spouse is always discontent; the best solutions according to counselors
We all can feel dissatisfied with life for various reasons and have complaints; however, some people carry this feeling of dissatisfaction with them all the time and constantly grumble. In this section of Khaneh PlusSelMagzWe intend to tell you what to do if your husband is always unhappy and complaining about everything.
Identify the Root Cause
If your spouse is constantly upset and complains about everything, there may be a deeper kind of dissatisfaction within them that you need to uncover.
Don’t Take It Personally
Remember that sometimes this dissatisfaction is not about you and is something that stems from within the individual, so don’t take it to heart.
Pay Attention to Their Unmet Needs
If your spouse keeps complaining about how you’re on your phone, why the kids are noisy, or why friends are over, it would help to look into what unmet needs are causing their dissatisfaction with these things.
Avoid Arguments
It’s completely natural to respond to their dissatisfaction with a strong reaction; however, it’s better to hold back and not engage in an argument with your husband, as it will only worsen the situation.
Seek Solutions
If your spouse frequently complains about a messy kitchen, don’t just disregard it. Identify any issue that could satisfy them and explore potential solutions.
Be a Good Listener
Listening to complaints and dissatisfaction isn’t easy and can be frustrating; but if you listen attentively to what they have to say, it will definitely help them feel better.
Value Their Feelings, Not Just Their Actions
Many people think complaining is completely normal and don’t manage it well; in such cases, you should understand and appreciate their feelings while showing that this behavior is not acceptable.
Change the Subject
If your spouse consistently complains about a specific topic, try to shift the conversation and change the subject.
Focus on the Positive
Remind yourself that you can experience positive things in life and have control over them. This negative outlook from both of you has made you complain and grumble continuously.
Ask How You Can Help
Make sure when your husband is complaining, you ask what triggered it and what you can do to help him feel more at ease.
Set Boundaries
Strive to be a caring, supportive, and loving spouse who prioritizes their needs. At the same time, set clear boundaries for yourself and maintain a healthy relationship.
Identify the Source of Dissatisfaction
You should definitely find out where these feelings of dissatisfaction stem from and what may have led to the other person’s negativity, causing them to complain about different issues.
Express Your Emotions
While your husband may want to vent his complaints and dissatisfaction, sometimes he forgets how it affects those around him. So, it’s better for you to share your feelings and remind him of this.
Take a Little Distance
Don’t allow his negative moods to ruin your day. It’s beneficial to occasionally take a step back to find your own peace.
Always Have Personal Space
If your husband doesn’t respect the boundaries you’ve set and doesn’t allow for some distance to resolve your issues, it’s better to create personal space for yourself.
Don’t Accept All Blame
You’re just looking for a solution; it’s not your job to ensure happiness andjoyisn’t solely your responsibility. If he isn’t enjoying his life, you are not to blame. It may relate to his job, neighbor, or family, so you shouldn’t have to resolve everything on your own.
Encourage Him to Manage His Feelings
No one but your husband is responsible for his emotions. Feelings of hopelessness,anger, shame, and sadness can only be controlled by the individual themselves.
Don’t Seek Revenge
Avoid seeking revenge, as this will worsen the situation and separate you further from one another without solving the problem.
Don’t Forget His Positive Qualities
Your spouse may complain so often that you forget their good behaviors, but it’s better to review the relationship and remind yourself of the positive traits that made you fall in love.
Build a Constructive Relationship
Try to establish a constructive relationship together. Ask each other questions, listen to your needs and wants, and avoid just complaining.
Surprise Them with Romance
If you can pull off a romantic and surprising gesture, such as buying tickets to their favorite concert, booking a nice hotel, and inviting them to their favorite restaurant, it will surely uplift their spirits.
Suggest Therapy to Him
Therapy, treatment, and counseling can be a suitable solution for your spouse and can help him identify the roots of his dissatisfaction and address the issue more easily.
