Strengthening.Love after marriage.
Many couples believe that love after marriage is different from pre-marital love and can be much more lasting. If we pay attention to some trivial issues and address them, problems in life will decrease, making love more durable.
What is the reason that some young couples, despite significant differences, manage to reach an understanding shortly after marriage, while couples who once loved each other can develop resentment and hatred?
Every marriage faces tense situations such as adapting to another person, starting a new job, having the first child, meeting new people, and illness of one partner. These tensions and problems test the essence of the couple.
It is necessary to accept differences from the start of the marriage and adhere to effective communication principles without expecting the opposite gender to fully understand us. In this section ofSelMagz.Learn about ways to sustain love after marriage.
Be emotionally and expressively generous.
Love your spouse unconditionally and express gratitude, but do so thoughtfully; don’t overdo it, meaning don’t shower them with affection every five minutes.
Have a spiritual and emotional commitment to your spouse.
If you want your life to remain stable forever, maintain emotional and romantic commitment; this commitment should be mutual. Remember that a grand wedding, diamond ring, or the shiniest wedding attire cannot guarantee your shared life.
Be honest about your true feelings and emotions.
Signs of dishonesty in marriage include acting, pretending, hiding things, and lying. Without honesty about our inner feelings, our marriage will face emotional and ethical hardships.
Make your spouse love your thoughts and mindset.
Always try to make your partner fall in love with your mindset and behavior since the most attractive part of people is their thoughts. Never rely solely on your appearance to win your partner’s heart; as time passes, your physical beauty will fade.
How to communicate with your spouse effectively?
Many disputes in shared life arise from a lack of communication and dialogue between partners. When two spouses begin to live together, they do not speak about their feelings, causing them to grow distant from one another. They may still live under one roof, but feel like two strangers rather than a couple.
Contrary to the belief of some couples, communication is not impossible. To unite and maintain a good shared life, we must learn how to communicate correctly with each other.
If we do not communicate or trust each other, we cannot understand or feel good about each other. Effective communication requires speaking and listening, and if we don’t master these two skills, we won’t be able to connect.
What are the barriers to sustaining love after marriage?
If you want a successful marriage, both partners must decide together and connect effectively. Below are some key obstacles to effective communication after marriage:
We do not want to upset our spouse.
Many couples think that if they are honest, their spouse will become upset and thus refrain from expressing their opinions. This may seem kind, but it can backfire later; therefore, we should lovingly and kindly express our truths without hiding them.Negative emotions.Do not unload your frustrations on your spouse.
Selfishness of one spouse.
Selfishness is one of the barriers to communication and unity in marriage. Selfish individuals tend to impose their opinions on their partner and act contrary to their needs.
Altruistic love is the opposite of selfishness. As long as we do not let go of our selfishness, this is impossible. To overcome your selfishness, be a role model for your spouse’s behavior because most of us positively respond to examples of love.
Lack of confidence.One of the largest barriers to communication after marriage is the lack of self-esteem. Many of us constantly think about our failures and seldom consider our successes, often feeling threatened in our interactions.Therefore, during marriage, we often avoid expressing our opinions out of fear of rejection or failure. The primary factor causing psychological disturbances and
depression
in women is low self-esteem.Certainly, alongside your weaknesses, you have strengths and the potential for success in many areas, so always try your best and use your abilities to succeed.If your spouse lacks confidence, support them with love and attention to boost their self-esteem, accept the past, and focus on the future. Helping your spouse helps them change their negative mindset to a positive one and takes steps to grow your shared life.
Excessive anger from one partner.
Anger and
frustration
make communication very difficult. If anger is controlled properly, it can reveal parts of your relationship that need attention.If you experience sudden anger in your relationship, when you calm down, revisit the issue and discuss it again with your spouse. If you do not manage your anger, it may lead to separation, but if you control it, it can bring you closer.Avoidance of conversation.
One common problem among couples after marriage is that one partner, often the husband, tends to avoid talking and remains silent. Some of us become introverted in childhood for various reasons, but we can learn how to discuss issues and experiences with our spouse.
Start a conversation by discussing current or past issues; if you can’t verbalize your problem, write a letter to your spouse and ask them to read it in your presence. Understand that without communication, your spouse cannot understand your issues and unmet needs.
A starting point for sustaining love after marriage.
It’s best to start with yourself.
When your spouse is watching television, sit quietly beside them without saying anything.
- Say goodbye when separating from one another.
- Simple actions like holding hands while walking can enhance your shared life.
- Make requests in a humorous way so that your spouse won’t feel defensive.
- If your spouse does not have serious faults, avoid excessive honesty and constant criticism.
- Speak less. Some spouses prefer their partner to speak emotionally and concisely while allowing them to process what they’ve heard.
- Men and women are different and communicate in entirely different languages.
- Many disagreements remain unresolved, so agree on managing your disagreements.
- Do not hold back on praise and admiration as it strengthens marital relationships.
- Start with changing and improving your behavior, particularly addressing bad habits; do not focus solely on changing your spouse since your changes will also influence them.
- If you have a request from your spouse, express it directly to avoid irritability and guilt for them.
- Keep a picture of your spouse in your wallet.
- Tell your spouse that you love them.
- Call your spouse at work and say you missed them and wanted to hear their voice.
- Greet each other with a smile when entering the home.
- Buy your spouse gifts like flowers for various reasons.
- Send your spouse a romantic text or a sweet poem or a joke.
- Do not label your spouse with negative names like stupid, crazy, lazy, useless, or foolish; never undermine their identity. Labeling your spouse destroys trust, intimacy, and closeness between you.
- Avoid statements like “You never understand” or “You only think of yourself” that are accusatory and insulting, indicating that “You are at fault, and all blame rests on you.”
- Do not bring up past issues when angry. Revisiting the past to collect evidence of your spouse’s weaknesses only deepens the rift between you.
- Maintain an “open” and “receptive” body language. Motioning with body language like biting your lip, frowning, grinding teeth, squinting, or staring suspiciously only conveys to your spouse without words: I do not intend to establish effective communication with you.
- Love after marriage and common misconceptions about it.
- After marriage, forget the myths and pay attention to the points outlined below.
Marriage does not automatically lead to
happiness.
Happy individuals understand that happiness in marriage does not always equate with personal happiness. They recognize that personal happiness plays a crucial role in creating feelings of happiness in a committed shared life.After marriage, individuals must balance personal interests with what strengthens their shared relationship, as creating an intimate bond may necessitate letting go of personal interests.A good marriage will always remain romantic.
In many unsuccessful marriages, you often hear the phrase “I love them, but I’m not in love with them.” When a spouse loses their charm since the early days, this statement tends to resurface. Almost all marriages experience a dimming of passionate love.
In some marriages, love lasts for several years, while in others, it may fade just a few months after getting married. However, it’s crucial to understand that love still exists; it has only transformed. If romantic love persists and the couple remains engaged, they can still face issues like work, parenting, and social relationships.
Sharing household chores fairly in a
successful marriage.
Never spoil your mood over household chores or argue with your spouse about it. Many women encounter issues due to the unequal distribution of household responsibilities with their husbands, so strive to reach an agreement and share chores fairly.
But if your husband refuses to take on household tasks, don’t be too upset; many women manage despite having to do everything on their own.If you are unhappy in your marriage, divorce may be the best solution!
Sometimes, an individual’s harmful behaviors such as addiction, illegal acts, and severe psychological disorders leave no choice for the spouse but divorce. However, many reasons for pursuing divorce are trivial. Not all couples agree on every aspect of life.
If we occasionally see issues from our spouse’s perspective, we show flexibility. To achieve happiness in marriage, resolve your disputes with one another, and don’t think of divorce over minor disagreements.
Successful marriage.
Does love fade after marriage?
Spousal behavior.
