Managing Interference and Advice from Your Mother-in-Law
Shared life has its ups and downs, where neither the bitter moments last nor the sweet ones. What remains are the memories created together, the efforts made to solve problems, and the support provided to one another. As mentioned, married life is not just roses; sometimes, the family of one’s spouse interferes for various reasons—some valid, others not—in a way that can sour relationships. While couples often support one another through these difficulties, some seek strategies to avoid badmouthing and gossip.Mother-in-Law InterferenceWhat You Should DoSelMagzWe have published these behavioral tips aimed at couples dealing with a gossipy mother-in-law and a nosy spouse.
Be Friends with Your Spouse
Treat your spouse well and be supportive, encouraging each other to build resilience against life’s challenges. This way, no one can dominate your spouse. Also, do not blame your partner for their mother’s behavior, as it can create distance in your relationship.
Don’t Speak Ill of Your Spouse’s Family
Refrain from badmouthing your spouse’s family and show that you genuinely care for their well-being. This approach will render gossip from others ineffective because your spouse knows your true character and understands you would never wish harm upon their family.
Do Not Leave Your Spouse Alone
If your spouse’s family speaks negatively about you in your absence, it’s better to avoid gossip and accompany your spouse to their mother’s house. However, if your mother-in-law is not one of those meddling figures, sometimes let your spouse visit their mother alone for a while.
Avoid Confrontation
Some mothers-in-law offer guidance when talking with their children, and sometimes daughters-in-law misinterpret this care as interference and immediately become defensive. Make sure to understand your mother-in-law’s intentions; sometimes, she truly wants to support your marriage.
Change the Subject
If you are sure that your mother-in-law has bad intentions and is speaking ill of you to your spouse, find ways to interrupt their conversation when they are alone to cut it off.
Control Visits
To prevent your mother-in-law’s interference in your life, reduce your level of contact, but never sever ties entirely. Just ensure that the reduction does not lead to greater problems.
Final Thought:
In face of your mother-in-law’s gossip when you’re not around, maintain respect for your spouse by behaving politely and calmly. If you are unsure how to handle this issue, it may be helpful to consult a family therapist or psychologist.
